Bad Boy Good Girl Attraction

 

 For some time now I have been wondering the chemistry between a good girl and a typical bad boy. Often times, we get to hear stories how a beautiful sister, with good morals, sound education and very hard working would fall madly in love with this brother that could pass for a jerk. Forget the good look `thing, I’m talking about a man who probably doesn’t know or value her worth, he goes about chasing anything in skirt, sometimes he get physically or emotional violence with her, a heavy drinker, chain smoker and worse still high on marijuana or cocaine. Why in the world would a God fearing sister find such a man irresistible? In my quest for the answer, I had to engage some friends on social network. I got loads of response in my inbox, some of responses came from sisters that confessed to be once a victim or current victims.
 Let’s read what some of those responses;
                                             
                                
 Reason #1: Bad boys want to become good. And who else could better accomplish this than a good girl? Nice girls always tend to have a blind spot when it comes to bad boys gone good, and they just adore seeing them change. They are also highly interested in helping them change and being able to brag about this accomplishment.

 Reason #2: Bad boys force the bad side out of a good girl. All good girls like to picture what their life would look like should they be on the bad side. Bad boys manage to help them achieve just that and help them get rid of their shyness.

 Reason #3: Bad boys are never boring. They always have something to do, places to go, people to see. You can’t say you dislike traveling together and going on new. Adventures all the time. At times, their adventures might prove to be just a tad more dangerous than a good girl might expect, but that is the fun in going out with such a bad boy, anyway. 
Reason #4: A bad boy offers something that’s different. There is just this excitement associated with somebody who’s very different from you. Reason 

#5: Bad boys are mysterious. They somehow always manage to create and maintain an aura of mystery around themselves. And even though the ladies love to know their men by heart, some of them also prefer to have certain things hidden from them. Something in their man’s past that is hidden, that he never talks about, just drives them crazy. 

Reason #6: Bad boys seem to be more passionate. Bad boys are always more or less consciously associated with passionate activities, and of course love-making is one of them. But they are also thought to be more passionate so it is easy to see why the ladies might dig that – no one likes a wimp, right? 
Reason #7: Bad boys are more secure. Ladies tend to prefer a man who has self-confidence and security. If the man they are with is secure at all times, women tend to feel better protected. Bad boys always manage to at least create the illusion of being extremely protective and secure, having their head on their shoulders at all times and taking the bull by its horns no matter what. But are these reasons enough why good girls usually fall for bad boys? 
 Everyone falls in love for different reasons, what one girl would consider to be attractive might be completely repulsive to another one. We will do a part two of this research soon!!! 
Xoxo Elsie-Coco

To My Mum On Mother’s Day Special!!!

There are really no words enough to describe my jewel of inestimable value, my mother, Mrs Elsie-Ekpoawan U. Williams.
My mum is the strongest woman I know, for nine stressful months she protected me in her womb. Went through the narrow road of life/death to ensure my existence. She fed me with milk from her breasts and held me in her arms to rest despite the inconvenience of my helpless little self. As my guardian angel, she made sure I was on the right track and instilled respect in me through disciple. Praises and prayers is what I have learnt from her since infancy and in the days I’m too weak to pray, I remember she is praying for me always. As a wife, she was submissive, supportive and loving to my late father. She stood by him through the good and bad times, in health, sickness, pain and even in death.
A great teacher she is, mother to many. Her children and grandchildren are her priority. She worries about us when things don’t seem to be going on well. Every week she makes sure she calls me to find out so many things; how I’m faring health wise, how the Big Sister brand is doing, and when I’ll be taking some time off work to walk down the aisle lols.
That is my mum, my rock, my back bone, shoulder to cry on, best friend and cook for life. Thank you for making me who I am today, you are simply the BEST OF ALL DEM MOTHERS.

WHEN HE DASHES YOUR HOPE...

Mandy was in her late twenties when Ikenna, her then fiance jilted her. He was her first love, the first guy she ever dated. They started dating since her early twenties  before he called it quit with the relationship.
As expected, Mandy was devastated. It took a long while before coming to terms with the heartbreak that had closed that chapter of her life.
Three years after shutting out men from her life, Mandy decides to  move on with her life. Now, she is ready for a fresh relationship and suitors have been coming out but the issue now is, the suitors that come do not last. The men will propose, lift up her hope and within a month or two, she realizes the relationship is no more.
That has been the story with all the guys she met after Ikenna and it has affected Mandy a lot. She is miserable and withdrawn. She thinks she is jinxed and is worried why the men will not stay.
What the likes of Mandy should  understand is that marriage is a serious institution and should  not be toyed with. It is a life long bond which we have to think about it properly before making our decision. Maybe the men seem to understand this better than women.
Obviously, it hurts when your expectations is dashed and promises made broken at the time when almost all your friends and mates are married with children but there are so many things women should know such as the following;
-Even though age is not on your side, do not be desperate and eager to settle down. When you tell yourself this, you won't be hurt when any son of Adam reneges on his promise.
-A broken relationship/engagement  is better than a broken marriage.
-Don't brood over it so much. Don't allow it give you sleepless nights because you may end up doing what you will regret like inflicting body harm on yourself. No man is worth dying for, always remember that.
-Don't you think that the guy dashing your hope affords you another opportunity for preparing yourself for marriage?
-Tell yourself that he is NOT for you, that a better guy is coming on the way.
Prepare your mind to a state of not taking a guy serious when he proposes. That way, you won't feel hurt when he does the unexpected.
-Involve yourself in activities that would take your mind off the pain of being jilted. Live your life, start fulfilling those dreams you've always had since childhood.
-Discuss your problems with a marriage counselor and confide in a man of God for further counseling and prayers.
Wish you the best.
Elsie-Coco

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Making the best of you this new year

And so year 2014 is finally here and I am grateful to God from the dept of my heart. As I look back the year that just passed, I see so many goals and dreams that never became a reality and that makes me even more excited for this new year. 

I've never been so positive before about any year than I am for year 2014. All I  couldn't do, where I couldn't go, things I couldn't achieve all at my beck and call this year and with the special grace of the Almighty, I am so in control of this year and it is my wish for all my numerous readers world over to take charge and make the best out of year 2014 as well.

It could be difficult but we will pull through together with the following guide.

GET MORE CLOSER TO YOUR MAKER: 
 
The holy book says the secret of God is with those that know him for He shall show them His covenant and those that wait on Him, He will renew their strength. In whatever you do in 2014, acknowledge him and He shall direct your path.

SURROUND  YOURSELF WITH POSITIVE TALK AND PEOPLE: 
 
Negative self talk, put downs and disparaging remarks and one’s own expense does nothing more than lower self esteem and self worth. Stay as far as the north is to the East and South to the West from people who don’t value you or often times look down on you.

YOU ARE NOT A DULLARD: It is not about how the world sees you, the most important thing is how you see yourself. There can only be one person like you and that alone makes you different and unique from every other person. Identify your key skills and competence that will certainly give you an edge over other.

WHAT VERSION ARE YOU? 
 
Develop yourself into the best version of yourself because every other person is already taken. Books, courses, certification, voluntary works, networking, events, seminars or conferences can help sharpen your values in life. No matter how good you are, there is someone’s knowledge or expertise which you can leverage on for the furtherance of your goal. Find a mentor or success coach that you can turn to for advice or mentor.

MAKE A FLIGHT PLAN FOR THE YEAR: 

 Make a list of your goals for all the twelve months of the year and steps to achieve every one of them, of course, you back it up with prayers.

FINANCIAL BUDGET: Plan for the worst, hope for the best. Ensure you have a savings plan to prepare for the rainy day in event of pay cuts, downsizing/right sizing or redundancies.

CREATE TIME FOR YOURSELF: 
 
No matter your statues martially or professionally, let none of those rob you of your special moments with yourself. Pay attention to good grooming, your hair, face, teeth, your outfit and accessories. Create time for your love life, hang out with good friends and smile as much as you can, help those you can. Whatever strategy you develop for increasing your self esteem or self worth, just know you are truly the cake and everyone’s positive thought of you is the icing.

Enough said, please connect with me on fb@ http://www.facebook.com/lcycoco.

Follow me on twitter @ ElsyCoco

A LETTER TO MY FUTURE BOO (where ever you maybe right now)

 BABY,
That's what I'll call you,
You may come across this now or later, but certainly, some time very soon, we'll walk down the aisle together, and the clergy will pronounce us MAN and WIFE!
There and then we'll have each other- in ONE LOVE!                                                                                                                                               I’m I
'm not assuming it will be a bed of roses, there will be tough times I know but with GOD, we wither every storm for our home will be built on the solid rock, JESUS CHRIST! So every misunderstanding of ours will seal our BOND.
 
SEX! AAAhh! The mare thought of it makes me smile. It doesn’t matter the time, we will HAVE IT! We will savor each other passionately. And our children, I see my eyes in Zhara-Mia AsianAbasi (our daughter) a replica of me and I see a miniature of you in our sons (whatever you’ll name them).We might decide having a full house…LORD will give me the strength to push them out, we will love them without sparing the rod.


Baby, I have so many plans unfolded but I’ll reserve them to plan them with you then, but one thing you must know now is, each day, I would love to keep you always and forever. You will not only be my better half, I will be your queen, and you will be my lover, best friend, a good provider for me and our , my number fan and  supporter of my brand-Big Sister. I couldn’t have wished you to be taller, shorter, darker or fairer. You might not be the best man in the world, but certainly the best man for me.
Come rain, come shine, I’ll be there for you till death does us apart. This I promise you, patiently I’m  waiting for you to take my hands, baby just has to be you and I (US) ONE FLESH!                                                                                                                                            
Coco-Elsie (your boo)                                                                                                   

                                                               Picture is Photoshopped.
                                                                                                                                                    

                                                                                

MEET ME UP CLOSE & PERSONAL

People say I’m soft spoken, curvy and sexy! In addition to that, professionally, I am a woman of many parts, I’m a fiction writer, editor/publisher of Big Sister Magazine, Africa’s premier health and lifestyle magazine for the curvy and plus sizes women. I blog for the fun of it, hoping to make serious cash from it like Bella Naija and Linda Ikeji and their likes.

I co-present a live love talk show on radio, an actress ‘in making’, thanks to my actress and producer bestie, Dorothy Essien. lols.

I’m also a plus size model, and a plus size industry leader/ ambassador. I do bits of public and motivational speaking for shows organized to empower the curvy girls. That act has motivated me into producing/presenter Big Sister Magazine Tv show coming your Tv screen and youtube soon. I am a daughter to my mother Mrs. Elsie Snr, and a sister to my four siblings. I have three lovely nieces and seven handsome nephews.

EDUCATIONAL BACKGROUND

Primary School; Hillside Nursery School, Calabar and Central Bank Staff School, Satalite Town, Lagos.

High School: Loral Private School, Festac Town, Lagos and Immaculate Conception Secondary School, Akwa Ibom State.

Tertiary Institution: French Language (OND) and History and International Studies (BA) both from the University of Calabar.

WHAT MAKES ME THICK?

God, and the fact that I’m restless when it comes to my career, passion and success.

BONDEST STEP EVER TAKEN:

 Most definitely my career, living my dream.

FONDEST CHILDHOOD MEMEORIES:

● Living next door to famous singer Asa and sexy runway model Kingsley Eze

●I had this deep crush for Tevin Campbell. He was such a cute child star.   

●I wrote my first script at ten, the inspiration came after reading the WELL LOVED TALES SERIES, Cinderalla, Princess and the Frog and their likes.    

THE WOMEN I ADMIRE MOST:

●Terry McMillan. She is a writer of repute, I love her story lines, they don’t bore me in any way. She writes my kind of books.   
●Oprah Winfrey. She is a blessing to the entire womanhood. She is the richest and most influential black woman alive and it sheer hard work and diligence that has brought her that far. She is so dedicated at her career.     
FAVORITE FOOD:
●Jealof or Coconut rice          
●Afang or Edikangikong (vegetable) soup with sermovita.  

QUALITIES OF MY KIND OF MAN:                           

●Loving nature

Handsome

Have a good job

God fearing                                  

●Strength                                    

● Intelligence                              

  ●Humility                                     

● Responsible and I could go on and on

Advice to young entrepreneur

Nothing worth having comes easy, do you research properly, take a bold step towards your dream and leave the rest in the hands of the Almighty.

                                                                           Asa

 

                                                                         Kingsley

                                                                                       Tevin Campbell 

    Terry & Oprah  

                                                                                               I Oprahfied myself

                                                                       Jealouf rice

                                                                     coconut rice

                                                                                        Afang soup and sermo